| Sunday, March 09, 2008 |
| ENTRY 49: Holy Snow!!! |
Welcome to spring, everyone! It's been a quite a winter. Tell you the truth, I've had enough of winter, thank you very much...!
But it seems winter isn't done with us here in Toronto. In the last 24 hours, we've had to shovel the driveway 3 times; collectively I'd estimate that about 40 cm has fallen. The banks on either side of our driveway are at least 10 feet high. It's absolutely ridiculous.
I was supposed to have a party-filled weekend, but because of the weather most of them got canceled.
I really hope this is it. We haven't had this much snow in years, and I was starting to get used to the tranquil winters. We've been blasted by city-crippling blizzards, and it's getting a little old. Enough already!
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Frank Sinatra" - Cake (a GREAT song...a co-worker introduced me to it and I love it)
"Star Wars" - Nas (another awesome song...great lyrics...I need to listen to it more often)
"Hey There Delilah" - Plain White T'sLabels: playlist, snow, weather |
finished by Carter @ 9:49 AM   |
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| Monday, February 25, 2008 |
| ENTRY 43: The Week Ends |
I just want to say right off the bat that I apologize if every one of my posts ends up being about Joan of Arc. It's just that right now she seems to be such an important part of my life, though I highly doubt that she knows it. I wouldn't be surprised if I was in love with her. I definitely know that I want to be in love with her.
Anyway, the week that was came to a satisfyingly relaxing conclusion yesterday, which was great. On Friday we had a youth group meeting, where the youth were able to vent over the recent trials and tribulations that we all have been caught up in within our church. Without getting into it, the fact is that there is a war going on within our parish. Surprising at it may sound, it is fact, and it scares me and depresses me that this shit can be going on in the house of God, you know? We should all be getting along, but instead such bitterness, animosity, and hatred can flow between different parties. Joan and I had already decided between the two of us that we wouldn't take sides and try to be mediators, but in doing so both sides think that we are against them. It's hard being in the middle.
It was primarily why I was so tired this week; I was exhausted with all the fighting. At the end of the youth group meeting, we were able to talk briefly about relationships (which is actually what we were supposed to talk about that evening lol), and Joan got really excited that her and I had so much in common when it came to what we wanted in , and what we brought to, a relationship. Pretty awesome, but again I had no idea how to take advantage of the situation. I know, I know....I seriously need help!
I needed to blow off some steam, so on Saturday I finally was able to reach what had become my regular weekend chill spot, Smokey Joe's. I hadn't got on a dance floor in months, and for a second I thought that I had lost my rhythm. Lucky for me, I hadn't and I danced the night away. A lot of my Smokey Joe friends were there, so it was a blast! I was able to sleep for most of the day Sunday for a change, and I was able to go to work refreshed! A big change from last week.
All in all, things are looking up I guess, so I hope they just continue to improve.
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Diary" - Alicia Keys feat. Tony Toni Tone
"Presidential MC" - Method Man feat. Raekwon & RZA
"Snow (Hey Oh)" - Red Hot Chili Peppers
"If I Ever Fall in Love Again (a capella)" - Shai
"Find Out" - ClassifiedLabels: Joan, love, playlist, Smokey Joe's, youth group |
| finished by Carter @ 8:00 AM |
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| Thursday, February 21, 2008 |
| ENTRY 42: Burn-out |
Okay, so today is Thursday, and I can't think of any other time where I was this happy for Friday to be right around the corner. Usually the third week in a month is hectic with meetings and such, but this month has been just ridiculous!
Problems started on Sunday with the annual Vestry meeting after church. It was so freakin' crazy that I took me a couple of days to fully comprehend everything that happened, hence why I haven't blogged about it yet. Thing is that there's been a heckuva lot of fallout from the meeting, and I'm still trying to do clean-up as we speak. Overall, the experience has been incredibly draining.
If that was the only thing that had happened this week, I would have been able to manage (just barely, but I could've done it). However, I had another meeting on Tuesday, and another one at Wednesday, both of which were also church-related. And in both cases, the events of Vestry inevitably arose in conversation, and tempers flared. And here I am, lucky me, caught right in the middle. It's freakin' church; I don't want to take sides -- that's not what church is supposed to be all about. Instead I have the almost impossible task of trying to keep everyone appeased while trying to solve the larger issue almost single-handedly. Fun!
Along the way, I kind of forgot to sleep: I haven't had more than 4 hours of sleep since Sunday. Last night of work I couldn't function and made so many mistakes I thought I was going to lose my job right then and there. Shit, I still feel like my job is in jeopardy; a total of 4 people lost their jobs in the last week, so I'm sweating bullets after last night's performance.
I'm. So. Tired. Of everything. Didn't help that I had to watch My Competition suavely move in on Joan during the Wednesday meeting. Fuck, man. Need sleep. Need to get away....!
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Romancipation" - Musiq Soulchild
"What We Do" - Freeway feat. Jay-Z & Beanie Sigel
"Soulstar" - Musiq Soulchild
"Drive It Like I Stole It" - Apathy
"Right About Now" - Talib Kweli
"Wild For The Night" - Rampage feat. Busta Rhymes
"No Transitory" - Alexisonfire
"Say" - Method Man feat. Lauryn Hill
"Supreme Supreme" - Black Star
"Are We Cuttin'" - Pastor Troy feat. Ms. JadeLabels: church, Joan, playlist, work, youth group |
| finished by Carter @ 5:36 PM |
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| Monday, February 18, 2008 |
| ENTRY 41: Rusty Reason |
I have the bad luck of being interested in too many things, and a person can really only focus on a few things at once. As such, I tend to rotate the activities and hobbies I partake in every year or so. Right now, it's screenwriting and movies in general, as well as youth group.
Recently, however, I've started to delve back into one of my other major hobbies: music. It started when I was approached by a few of my co-workers who also are musicians, suggesting that we all put our heads together and collaborate for some awesome stuff. I was all in, but the truth is that I haven't touched my music in over a year. I completed an album back in November of 2006 and haven't really done anything since. I had lost my music program when we re-formated our computer and since I didn't have any way to regain it, I turned my attentions elsewhere.
Well, thanks to my new, ridiculously awesome E500, I was able to get my hands on the program again: Propellerhead Reason 4.0. Now I had used version 3.0 in the past, so I was excited to see what this new version brought to the table. Imagine how dismayed I was when I realized how much of an effect one year of standing on the sidelines can have. Not only have I not done any production in over a year, but I haven't done any song-writing in that span of time as well. As a result, I'm EXTREMELY rusty -- so far my attempts at both have been laughable, and frankly very embarrassing. I just hope I can get to the level I had been at when I stopped...!
In any case, I'm very very very excited!
P.S. This doesn't mean screenwriting and film school is going to the back burner; I'm still actively writing both scripts I'm working on at the moment :) yay!
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Where You Gonna Run" - Talib Kweli & Jean Grae
"What Happened to that Boy" - Baby feat. The Clipse
"Whereareyougoing" - Musiq Soulchild
Labels: music, playlist, Reason, screenwriting |
| finished by Carter @ 8:11 AM |
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| Wednesday, February 13, 2008 |
| ENTRY 39: Winter Blank-Outs |
Ever since it came to my attention that my film school dream would be postponed, I've drifted into a listless cycle of monotony. It's gotten to the point where I've started to randomly blank out for up to 5 minutes at a time, then I'll snap back to reality and realize that I'd been whispering the lyrics to some rock song.
In any case, due to this monotonous spell, my emotional high has subsequently expired. I don't know if it's pessimism or realism, but I'm seeing the world through a different set of glasses, and they're definitely not rose-coloured this time around. My confidence in my pursuit of Joan of Arc has all but completely evaporated. I discovered on Sunday that I have competition, and that this competition is very stiff. I'm not much of a fighter when it comes to these kinda things, so thus circumstances don't look so good.
Winter has really hit hard in the last week or so. Last week Thursday we were hit with a ridiculously debilitating snowstorm that pretty much froze the city (pun somewhat intended). Buses were unable to run, and thus I got a day off work (woo hoo!). Overall, a total of almost 30 centimetres (~ 1 ft) of snow fell during that 24 hour period. Yesterday, we were hit with another storm, this one dropping about 15 cm. On top of all that, temperatures have dipped to as low as -30 degrees Celsius, which is the coldest it's been for a while now in Toronto.
I dunno, I kinda feel that everything right now is in winter mode. Nothing is happening, and everything just feels lifeless. I think that's why I've started to blank out every now and then; why pay attention when you know there is nothing worth paying attention to?
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Wicked Ways" - Lord Have Mercy
"Luchini" - Camp Lo
"Pimpin' Life" - Big Black Lincoln
"Vibrant Thing" - Q-Tip
"Womanopoly" - Musiq Soulchild
"Body Language"- Saukrates feat. Choclair
"Terrorist" - RZA feat. Black Knights & Killarmy
"Time Is Right" - Talib Kweli & MadlibLabels: blank out, Joan, playlist, snow, winter |
| finished by Carter @ 3:24 AM |
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| Thursday, February 07, 2008 |
| ENTRY 38: Dream Deferred |
Not sure if I mentioned this in before, but the orientation for film school was to be held today at 11 am, but due to circumstance this isn't going to happen. A couple of days ago, I received a call and email from Ed@trebas (lol that's what I call him) that due to the lack of enrollment the class will be postponed until June 2008.
I was REALLY looking forward to today and February 11th (the start date), but as it stands, it looks like I'll wait a little bit longer. The biggest problem, though, is my OSAP. It was set to be released on the 11th, but now that the class isn't starting until June 2008, will I have to apply all over again? Will my empoyment up to that point affect how much I receive? Sigh.
Well, all things considered things could be a lot worse :P At least I got a sweet laptop in the meantime!
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Sexual Eruption (Sensual Seduction)" - Snoop Dogg
"Blurry" - Puddle of Mudd
"What Happened to that Boy" - Baby feat. The Clipse
Labels: film school, laptop, playlist |
| finished by Carter @ 8:29 AM |
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| Thursday, January 31, 2008 |
| ENTRY 35: Minor Setback |
So, which is very unlike me, I stuck to my word and "asked" Joan out. As promised, I kept it very casual; I asked her if she had seen such-and-such a movie yet, since I was planning on seeing it later on in the week and was wondering if she wanted to come with. Good? Not good? I need some critique.
Unfortunately for me, she had (would you believe it) just seen the movie the day before, and warned me that it was kinda long, though it did have its good parts. And so, I was left empty-handed. She did, however, thank me for checking...
Minor setback. I don't think she was completely blowing me off...I hope so, anyway. The adventure continues!
BLOG PLAYLIST
"Focus" - Joe Budden
"No Transitory" - Alexisonfire
"Close Edge" - Mos Def
Labels: Joan, playlist |
| finished by Carter @ 8:46 AM |
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| Monday, January 28, 2008 |
| ENTRY 34: Curve-balls! |
It's funny. Before I'd be able to do pretty much a post a day; now I can barely manage one post a week. It's not like I have less to say. On the contrary, my life has been throwing me a lot of curve-balls lately, but dammit these are curve-balls I've been waiting for for quite some time now!
Things have really come along at work, and I've been able to settle down into a nice rhythm. On the other hand, I can't help but feel a bit put off by some dissention that is going on there. There is one guy that I hang out a lot with at work, and unfortunately for a lot of others, he is -- there are no two ways about it -- a bona fide, complete asshole. He is impossibly selfish, grossly opinionated, and offensively libertarian; he really doesn't give a shit who he puts off and when. He will say whatever he wants with complete disregard to who is around. At least twice a night I'll think "Did he really just say that? Am I-- Am I really supposed to respond to that?" So obviously, he isn't that well liked.
So why do I hang around with The Asshole? Well as far as geeks go, he and I are a pair of bananas in the same bunch. We're both HUGE comic book enthusiasts; we bring in our favourite titles and trade 'em up. He's introduced me to Robert Kirkman, who has since become my favourite comic book writer, and his titles (Invincible, Brit, and The Astonishing Wolf-Man) have become instant favourites, as well. On the other hand, I've introduced him to Bendis' Powers, which he enjoys. He has a great idea for a comic, and I'll be helping him out with the writing of it. He has introduced me to Lost, which has since usurped Heroes as my favourite currently running show.
All in all, excluding how we treat people, The Asshole & I have a lot in common. I can deal with him abhorrent behaviour, so I stick around. Plus, we're starting to play Dungeons & Dragons. How cool is that?
Okay don't answer that.
Curve-ball #2. As I mentioned in a previous post, Joan of Arc and I are both "junior" youth leaders in my church, and we work with the main youth leader, who is a SAINT. Anyway, over the weekend I confessed to St. Leader about my feelings for Joan, and to my surprise she was excited and happy! I just wanted to get it out of the way so that things wouldn't end up getting awkward and weird, but turns out St. Leader has been trying to play match-maker with me and Joan for quite a while now! On a long drive back from a workshop, she gave me some advice on what I should do and how I should proceed, and so yeah, I'm going to ask Joan out today. Nothing huge, just a movie thingy, but I'm positive that it'll be a good start.
Joan is just coming off stress leave from work, which really surprised me altogether: Joan stressed and out of sorts? Was that even possible?! I tried to be there for her without seeming too weird; she really appreciated it and it I think it brought us closer. During an outing with our young adult group at Church, she actually sought out body contact (leaning against me, hand on arm, etc.)! So yeah, I hope it'll all work out great.
Seriously, I've never felt this way, to the point where I'm actually consciously pursuing a love interest. It's all still so surreal. Me, fighting for love? Really?
Anyway, the curve-balls are coming fast, I just hope I'll be able to get at least some base hits...!
BLOG PLAYLIST
(a new feature, where I write down the songs I've listened to while typing out this post)
"I'm Sprung" - T-Pain
"Impossible" - Kanye West feat. Twista, Keisha Cole & BJ
"Terrorist" - RZA feat. Black Knights & Killarmy
"Rock Co.Kane Flow" - De La Soul feat. MF DOOM
"Strictly For The Heads" - Irs
"Burning Up (extended remix)" - Faith Evans feat. Missy Elliot & Freeway
"No Transitory" - Alexisonfire (Joan's favourite band!)
"Don't Leave Me Girl" - Blackstreet
"Throw Some D's (remix)" - Kanye West
Labels: comics, D and D, Joan, playlist, work |
| finished by Carter @ 2:15 PM |
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| The famous words of Jesus Christ resonate with my person: words impressing me with total, victorious finality. Words that I hope to say down the road. |
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Home: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
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