What a crummy Friday afternoon. The clouds are heavy, it's already rained but it looks like it's only getting started, and here I am inside with nothing to do but make a blog post. I tried to go out earlier today when it was still clear, but ultimately I did not because 1) I was tired and 2) the bright sunlight was hurting my eyes. I think that means that I've officially stayed at my job too long; it has gotten to the point where I have trouble adjusting to sunlight. Christ.
But yeah. I've resigned to the fact that I will never have a date with Joan. It just isn't going to happen. I was feeling really brave and optimistic is morning, and for a good reason, too (I'll tell you why in a bit). So much so that I was like "You know what? Let's just ask her out. She probably likes me, you know". So I asked her out, and she said no. For the second time. Ha.
I'm at a crossroads in my life. The realization has been dawning on me over the last couple of days, so really this was a now or never kinda deal. I'm starting film school June 9th, and I'm REALLY REALLY excited. I was so optimistic over life in general because of how well the orientation to my classes went on Wednesday. The teachers and faculty are great, and already they think I'm a genius and a perfect fit for the school. I've already gotten offers to work on sets with people who have worked with the likes of freakin' Samuel L. Jackson. It's Scott Pilgrim awesome.
I'm at a time where I have no choice but to move forward in everything that I do. Combined with all the shit that's been happening at my church, I figure it's time to let go of all the crap I've been holding on to for simply nostalgic reasons, and forge onward with what my life should really look like. So I asked Joan out, because she was something I thought would be a big part of my real life. Apparently not.
I'm excited, but sad at the same time. I'll have to let go of church (too stressful and not worth it) and Joan, because I really need to move on. It's just wasn't healthy anymore! Can't wait until June 9th, though....it's gonna be epic!Labels: church, film school, Joan |
